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Tuesday, April 03, 2007

How to Write An Ode To A Dog...

...Well, I don't bloody know, do I?! What are you looking here for??

But that was a google search only this morning (or last night, dependant on your POV). They ended up here. BTW: I've never had a dog and never will, they smell and molt hair everywhere and when you take them out, you have to pick up their poo. I mean, what more can you NOT want in a pet? Oh yeah: they make an absolute racket too!! What a good idea. A smelly noise machine in the house. I have kids and a husband for that thanks, I don't need my ear drums to explode any more than they actually do.

I also got a more worrying one, which was

Bristol + obits + Adrian Mead

Fortunately I got an email from his camp almost immediately afterwards about my cheque for The Long Distance Screenwriter (it's NOT bounced, thank you!) and I'm sure they would have mentioned that Mr. Mead will not be available in June after all...

While we're on the subject, many many thanks to all the people who've emailed me links to books and websites on my phobia of flying: very helpful! Thanks also to the so-called hypnotherapist from Brighton who emailed me to say he could cure me in "one afternoon, as long as I was prepared to take my clothes off." Apparently he saw my picture on the old AOL blog and provided I haven't "gone all saggy" from having the baby, he'll be more than pleased to utilise his considerable skills. The mind boggles as to how hypnotherapy for a flying phobia has become some sort of double entendre, but as I've always said: there are plenty of cyber weirdoes out there my friends. You have been warned!

On a completely different note, I saw a documentary about Anacondas last night. They are truly amazing snakes. Effing scary though. Having said that, the Biologist hunting them down, measuring them and stuff called one of them Marion, which must have affected her swamp cred for the worse. Ouch.

Laters! ; )

6 comments:

Lianne said...

Marion the deadly snake, excellent! I love incongruous names like that.

I think you should name and shame the pervy would-be hypnotist by the way. He deserves it!

Lucy said...

I know! Not as good as a Boa Constrictor I once knew called Annabelle tho.

I would love to name and shame him my friend, but it was signed only B and came from a hotmail account. So watch out laydeez for "hypnotists" from Brighton (if indeed that IS where he's from) with names beginning with B, that's all I'm saying.

Lianne said...

I shall be extra vigilant ;-)

Good Dog said...

they smell and molt hair everywhere and when you take them out, you have to pick up their poo.

...you know, it's too obvious, let's not even go there.

Lucy said...

Careful GD or I'll be having words with my mates Marion and Annabelle!

Olaf Legend said...

An ode? I attempt one once, but it turn out to be doggerel. I pun, yes?