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Friday, March 23, 2007

Talking Dirty

DISCLAIMER: It's Friday and I'm bored!

Anyone who reads my scripts knows I like to write sex scenes. Alot. And Readers seem to like them, as this one recently made clear:

You write great sex scenes....Ooooooooh boy!

The thought of my giving a lone Reader somewhere a little bit of a thrill is always nice, but someone I showed one of my scripts to recently came right out with:

This sex scene...Where did you get your inspiration from?

It's one of the few questions I've ever had about my writing that I just didn't have an answer to - or rather, didn't dare answer without looking like a freak. However, I managed to anyway, since I blurted out, "I watch a lot of porn." WTF? Not only is that a ridiculous answer, it's not even true: like most women seem to, I bloody hate the stuff, it's SO DULL and predictable for one thing, before we even get into the moral issues.

So, this little episode got me thinking: are all sex scenes (bar rape scenes, but you all know what I think of them, people!) autobiographical?? If I think alot of writing is in re/presentation - the RE-presenting of what we have done and/or thought about - and I do think this, are we actually kissing and telling on all our sexual conquests every time we write a sex scene??

Over to you...


Lucy said...

Of course, sex scenes aren't only limited to screenplays but novels and even songs too. I'd love to know the inspiration behind this one!!!

Tonight we make love with only words:
Girls first, girls first!
OK so like first I'll start by telling U how
Intelligent a curve your behind has
And then I can tell U that I can just smell U
And race cars burn rubber in my pants...
But I really dig trippin' on the thought of
Being caught by someone with your beauty, style and grace.
Baby I don't care, I would rip out my hair
4 just 2 nights with your face.

I don't want to make love 2 U,
I just want 2 look at U,
I just want 2 listen 2 U...

...Oh, pretty little whip, U got me drippin',
Drippin' all over the floor, the floor!
If I come back as a woman, I want a body like yours,
A body like yours.

I think... I think U would;
I think U wanna play house
Yeah, I think U wanna play house...

U don't mind?
I think U... uh...
I think U want me to (beep) inside of U
Yeah...yeah... I...

U want me to s...suck around your living room
Ha Ha
Yeah, U...U want me to walk right down your halls?

mmm hmmm

U want me to swivel in your love seat,
Don't U baby?

If someone asked me if I wanted them to swivel in MY love seat I'm not sure if I'd laugh or deck them!

My undying respect goes out to the person who can tell me the artist and album of the above

Good Dog said...

I think you'll find it's his purpleness' Lovesexy. Prince being the only chappie who could get away with:

...Oh, pretty little whip, U got me drippin'

Lucy said...

Shoulda known, it takes an old perv to know an old perv, GD!

Good Dog said...

That doesn't sound like "undying respect" to me?

Lucy said...

Oh it is, GD. It is. It's just very quiet. I'm in awe, in fact.

Good Dog said...


are we actually kissing and telling on all our sexual conquests every time we write a sex scene??

Actually, what I put down on paper seriously has to be toned down than what I get up to in real life.

Chris (ukscriptwriter) said...

I can't say I'm big on sex scenes. I have written one before, but it didn't make it to draft two.

If your readers say you write good sex, would you post an example (if you dare)?

Lucy said...

GD - is this in your dream real life??? ; )

Chris - if more people want me to post a sex scene, I will. But I have lots to choose from - do we want normal sex or twisted (werewolf) sex?

Lianne said...

Post the one that prompted this post in the first place. And the twisted werewolf one. Unless they are the same. Or you could edit together a selection from your scripts then sit back and watch your stats soar!

Like Chris, I don't write a lot of sex scenes. Mostly 'cause they just haven't been necessary to any of the stories I've written but also because I'm more interested in how the characters behave in those awkward before and after moments.

Lucy said...

That's your story and you're sticking to it, right Li!?

The one that prompted this post and got that nameless Reader "off" was from RUN. Quite a few of you out there have read it, what did you think? Did it excite you at all? Don't worry if it didn't!

As for so many of you NOT writing sex scenes, I can't believe there are so many PRUDISH WRITERS out there! For shame...

Good Dog said...

Cheeky, that would be real real life.

Of course sex scenes should only appear in a script if absolutely necessary.

After all, simply having one long gratuitous sex after another filled with tangled limbs glistening with sweat, breasts heaving, bodies arching, tongues and bared teeth and fingers sliding over skin as the explore.... ah, what was the point again?

Best just to have:


Curtains drawn the couple get undressed and neatly fold their clothes. Naked, they climb into bed and do it. It is ace and skill!

Afterwards the man has a cigarette while the woman gets on with the ironing.


Lucy said...

Eeeugh. No smoking and more importantly, no IRONING goes on in my house...

Chris (ukscriptwriter) said...

Lucy - I'll go for a normal sex scene. I've just watch Clerks 2 and have had enough beastiality (what else do you call werewolf sex? Or am I just uneducated?)

Lucy said...

As I understand it, it's actually BESTIAL, meaning "base" - you can be a "bestial" person yet never have sex with animals. The word has just been bastardised by the notion of "beastiality" which is in effect a colloquialism.

Chris (ukscriptwriter) said...

I stand corrected :)

Lucy said...

And don't you feel SO MUCH BETTER Chris? Bang2write is happy to oblige...

Olaf Legend said...

I once try to write sex scene, and yes it waskissing and telling - about the loss of my virginity - and just like actual occasion i ruin the scene by reaching the climax too soon.

That is too true to be funny.

Anonymous said...

I don't think they are autobiographical in that we experienced it that way, I think it is more of a fantasy, subconsciousness coming out